Steve, “Of all the problems eroding marriage, I do not see gay marriage as even on the list.” Yes, we agree. It looked as though a previous writer was giving statistics that would “suggest” cause-effect here. I just couldn’t let that be said. Glad to know I am not alone.

Jo Mooy GF suggested we are on same wavelength. I am curious, are we? The idea of community means something different to me. I know some men and women share children in a commune-like open marraige. This is a bit too novel for me, but I do not condemn anyone who can safely and non-violently find mutual love. It could be a bit confusing to the children’s adult identity as they mature; but only time will reveal that answer. I was thinking of two individuals finding an exclusive relationship. The only unconventional thought I had was the inclusion of woman with woman, man with man, or woman with man. I think trust is essential between two people and thus being exclusive helps.

Bella Mia, mmmm The writer quoted seems to suggest a link between the acceptance of same sex marriages and the reduced number of man+ woman marriages. Statistics and conclusions brought forth from them are tricky I think. The reduction of marriages may not have anything to do with the legal status changes. Anyone have any ideas on any of this? Bella? There’s a book, Freak-amonics that offers cases where the wrong conclusion can be made. For instance, in the late 1980’s, just 18-20 years after the legalization of choice for medical abortions, there was a drastic drop in crime from 18-20 yrs old age group. It could be argued that women (due to drug addiction, economic poverty, pregnacny due to rape, incest…..) chose to abort the child. With fewer unwanted and not-well-fed, economically deprived, possibly abused or neglected or cared for children—-being born, there were not a group of 18-20 yr olds with anger, with addictions of their own, and with little hope of success in their lives. It is a thread that links medical choice for women to a drop in crime rate. (I hope I expressed the book’s point of view OK.) Anyone have any ideas on any of this?

Blogging…is completely new to me and there is much I do not know. It would be easy for a person to switch identities here I guess. Doing that might make us less of a joined community of thought. For example,one of the novel aspects of facebook is the connection to friends of friends and like minded college kids. Now that we over-forty crowd —those without an “edu” address more spefically-whateverthe age—can be on facebook, I think some of the magic is gone. Wowowow wants to establish itself as an entity. Honest dialogue albeit with autonomous protection is central to this. Your mentioning the disappearance of Frank, a regular voice on this site for Women over Forty, and yours, a man with an opinion to offer for women over forty, has become part of the tapestry of this site. I suppose any man could pretend to be a woman and give posts, too. well…I linger to wonder…what will become of this site? Why is it there are no responses to contact us or talk to us?………. As for the cutting out of foul language—-that IS something I appreciate. Let’s communicate, not swear. nice talkin’ with ya’ James

She did this by saying one word: “Yes.” Peggy. Whe I read this posting some days ago, I thought,maybe I think oddly. To me, the saying of “yes” to God, says that we have free will. Since a woman, Mary, was willing to have faith, and to say “yes” we were given Jesus through her. If not her, then another would have been asked. We choose to have faith or not. We are given opportunitues every day to say “yes” in many ways every day through choices. Here I thought this was the message of the posting by Peggy. That we can choose to say “yes”. Saying nothing is not yes. A yes and actions to back up that yes. This was not easy in that time,nor is ti easy now. It is hard to act . I thought this was the idea behind a powerful woman. The willingness to stand firm, take the horrible sadness and trials of life, but to say “yes”. I am up to the challenge. Powerful women like Hillary Clinton, Oprah, and all the women mentioned here have taken one step, one day at a time, saying the important words. “yes” I will take on this challenge given to me. —-oh and I am not putting politicans or people held in high esteem in the same catagory as the Blessed Mother. I am just saying that God asks us first to say “yes” in our own lives as shown to us by Mary.

James, I am curious about how you would know if Frank was using a different icon or generic icon?

Surprised no one is talking about alternate marriage choices. While I had a good bit of dating and several proposals, once I said yes-that was it-for 29 years now with one man, now grey. However, there are many in love relationships that are man with man or woman with woman. Certainly these relationships are marriages in every form except for a legal license—-which is now changing in some states. Do you think civil unions meet the needs of these couples? Does the blessing of the church or lack theref-of make it any less or more a marriage? I would enjoy hearing some thoughts.

Elizabeth, I agree with you. IF Sen McCain had told the truth…..where have I heard that before? a person in government not telling the truth? oh, yea, right, it is our Pres.George W. Bush. Maybe the title of McSame is deserved If McCain now thinks it is more convenient to lie. Issues are complicated and cannot be taken down to small soundbites, but telling someone that can’t make their show becasue they are going on another show? This is not complicated and just plain lie.

“awkward for me to say I am a fan.” This poorly said phrase begs explaining. I have the highest regard for Oprah. To say the word —fan—that is awkward. I am not a fan of Walter Chroncite—-but respect him as a reporter and journalist. I am not a fan of Abraham Lincoln, but hold him up as an example of a man placed in the most terrible position of continuing to have soldiers die in the name of a nation- a nation that we now love as the USA. Oprah is not a movie star acting out a role-actors have fans. She is not an athlete which have fans. She is a mentor of opening minds to understand many opinions and has the trust of many. OK, so I think Oprah is a grand lady and glad to hear her show is on in parts of the world that most need to hear new opinions and ways of thinking about women and humankind in general.

Julia, Wendy Kopp. Great woman. Teach for America. An idea changing thousands of young people’s lives through education. Would you, could you, please write more posts on education; especially about TFA and the impact on New Orleans?

Belinda, While it is awkward for me to say I am a fan of Oprah, it is true. She has opened my eyes to “everyone has a story to tell” . This alone has helped me to listen. I can listen to others and yet feel an adequecy since I know I too have a story worth telling. She has sublty changed our words and therefore the way we think about each other. Enjoyed reading your post and agree with you that she is honest and has given her own truth to us. thanks

The dishes from the Beijing Olympics were cleaned, packed and shipped directly to Vancouver. The preparation is On ! The official caterer for the USOC had beautifully prepared and delicious food ready for athletes, sponsors and families. Looking forward to Vancouver.

Hello, Happy 21rst birthday to your daughter !!!!! :) Hope the evening is fun and the moon, almost still full, is shining brightly. from another mother who just experienced this paasage. So many moments like these will inspire our life.

Thank you for this piece. Let us not forget. We cannot forget the survivors, the innocent victims, those brought to feel the horror of the nightmare. It shows great courage and strength to be able to carry on this work to prevent future individuals from taking up the militant suicide terrorist propaganda that possesses some in hate. Yours is a story of caring and love and healing and hope for truth.

Yesterday was at a bus drop-off point of commuters coming home from NYC. We are League of Women Voters trying to offer an easy way to register to vote by taking a moment and completing the form. Heard comments “:was Hillary supporter but now voting for McCain”. As LWR I do not offer my opinion…….but….now here on this site,I can ask…. were not the platforms and vision almost identical for Sen Clinton and Sen Obama? Therefore it has to be personality…………or some “other” difference. I do think Ex-President Bill Clinton was just too large of a hurdle for the Obama Campaign. Issues need to be discussed, not personalities.