I was raised as a glass bubble child in a little Jewish neighborhood, in a little Jewish ghetto in Brooklyn, NY. Everybody I knew was Jewish except Yussel Washington the black porter who maintained the temple, and had to wear a yarmulke to do so. They referred to him as a Shabbes Goy because he was called on for all the activities we weren’t allowed to do during the high holy days: light our stoves, wash the dishes, put the stew in the oven so food was ready when one of our interminable fasts ended, and any other chores which were forbidden on Shabbas. Although he was accepted as a quasi-Jew of sorts, I knew something wasn’t kosher when he would say “Good Shabbas, Y’all” or talk of his favorite foods, matzo kugel with greens and ham hocks. The philosophy of the neighborhood was either you were a Jew or you were one of the “Others”. Who were the “Others”? I didn’t know, but I sure knew they were suspect. It wasn’t until I got to High School where I met “Others” and realized it wasn’t some alien race or religion. In fact, I learned we had more in common than not. And so the rebellion began. By the time I was a Senior I had a mixed group of friends, and was lying to my family. Hanging out with “goyem” or “Shvartsers” (the lexicon of my youth) was definitely forbidden. You didn’t bravely confront your parents in those days when your views differed from theirs; you just snuck around and lied. I went to the homes of my black friends, went to church with Christian friends, ate palate-popping meals made by the Mamas of Italian friends. In fact, I think it was the food that urged me to branch out. Senor year, I spent a Christmas weekend at the home of my best friend of the moment, Janet Scartone. We sat down Christmas Eve to a zillion-course meal: antipasti’s, seven fish dishes, pasta cooked every way possible, hot vegetable dishes, cold vegetable dishes – we ate for hours. And then we went to midnight mass only to return home and eat some more. I was in heaven; on our holidays, we fasted. Of course, that was before I learned how to get around the Jewish dietary laws, such as you can’t eat pork – except in Chinese restaurants. So although I identify as a Jew, even partake of a few holidays – the ones you can eat on – my heart is definitely “Others.” I believe in the teachings of the Bible, not really differentiating between the old and the new testaments, to me it’s just one continuing story. I believe in Moses and his delivery of the Ten Commandments, as well as the teachings of Jesus. I believe in a personal Jiminy Cricket as a gift from God and our strongest link to all that is good in the Universe and humanity.

Mugsy, I’m in. Pass the hat; I have plenty of cookies.

Sorry, I meant pre-Stonewall.

Yikes - Hope their personal hygiene habits are up to snuff.

Mark: Perhaps you should give bean a call. I think the two of you would hit it off famously.

Ulla: Thanks, I never noticed it.

Attention Founders: I don’t know if you read these posts but I have no other way to contact you. I have three suggestions: 1. Include on this wonderful site a way to communicate with one or all of the women who are responsible for running it. 2. Now that the average number of responses number in the hundreds (Congratulations!) an index of responders or comments would be so helpful. It is frustrating to have to go through pages over and over again should one care to respond to a response or see if their comment has been addressed. 3. How about a profile page of sorts? It would be a way for those of us who wish to know more about each other, or to contact another privately, could do so. Thank you so much for the time and effort you give to this wonderful creation. Being able to form relationships with people based solely on the contents of their heart and mind is an amazing thing. Are you black or not?…I don’t know. Are you Jewish or Muslim?… I don’t know. Fat or skinny? I don’t know. Gay or straight? Plain or beautiful? I don’t know, I don’t know, I don’t know. But I know if I like what you stand for, or not. l know if I respect your opinion, or not. I do know you all touch me, and make me think. And for that I cherish every one of you.

Bonnie: I’m sorry not to have gotten back to you sooner. I just found this post moments ago. Truth be told, I’ve been feeling a little troubled because of the way we are reading each other’s posts. If you feel I came at you too hard, I apologize. I guess when one’s skin is worn thin and sore from a lifetime of fighting even a hug can be painful. Re: the word marriage. I certainly respect the sanctity and all that lies behind the word, and that’s just the point. I feel, according to the history of my own 33 year+ devoted, monogamous , loving relationship we deserve no less. No less respect, no less legal recognition, no less enfranchisement. I do not wish to seen as variegated. I do not want to go into a Doctor’s office, for instance, and check a box that says domestic partnership. Right away I’m labeled. And unfortunately, as things still stand today, the label holds negative connotations. Although I am willing to stand up and fight in a forum where my anonymity is assured, I believe I mentioned previously, PGTL and I are for the most part closeted. It has been necessary at times, as I am covered under her health insurance plan, to explain to medical personal who and what I am under this “benefit” allowed us. Too often it has been humiliating and handled in the most mean-spirited way. I could go on with a lifetime of experiences to explain my position, but I’m sure you get the point. Maybe when groups no longer need to be identified as hyphenated, i.e. gay-american, Afro-american, Italian-american, whatever - when the minds and the hearts of the world can see beyond the label, I will walk free and proud no matter what classifying phrase is given to my life. Thanks for your sincere interest in thoughts. Sorry we got off on the wrong foot.

Good for you Caroline. It’s encouraging to read how you have grown. I’m sorry for the pain and embarrassment you suffered as a teenager. It sucks to feel you are different. Your Father and sister benefit in innumerable ways from your support. The consequence of not being recognized as fully sane and human by those you love never leave you. You all benefit from your new understanding.

Rose: This list is unbelievable and brings tears to my eyes. The crimes are heinous, my heart hurts for the victims. But I can’t help but believe so much of the twisted behavior listed above is the results of the horror the perpetrators themselves felt toward their own sexual desires at a very early age. When you are raised in a society, whether religious or secular, which accepts only their narrow view of what is normal it is devastating to your spirit - and entire sense of self - to discover you are physically attracted to another of the same sex. One often becomes so ashamed, and self-loathing that acts of debauchery seem to reinforce the monster you see in your own self-image. Please do not think that I, in any way, condone these acts. I also am well aware the vast majority of the homosexual community are healthy, upstanding citizens. Nor am I a bleeding heart who believes every criminal act should be forgiven based on lousy childhoods. I think in each and every one of these cases the punishment should fit the crime. Yet the crime of society needs to be addressed also. I’m so glad for sites like these that by and large give thinking intelligent people, no matter their gender, political affiliations, sexual preferences, the forum to speak their truth. Bless the founders and bless you all.

Rather than point fingers, I would be much more interested to hear your rationalization, or defense, of what has gone on during the last seven years

It is incredible what laser vision republican commentators have when they feel one of their own is being attacked. Where was their loyalty to the office, and their good manners when when Clintons sexual dalliances were smeared over every form of media that existed. Oh, and how cool was it to have his teen-aged daughter face daily the twists and turns of her father’s (a sitting President) genitals.

The funds for me…paypal here I come.

Thank you Peg, I’m glad I’m here too. And I’m especially glad you’re here.

Bravo - Doll Lady and thank you. It’s people like you who make our struggle bearable.